Love Is A Skill
Love is a skill we develop, not a feeling we feel. It is true that there are many wonderful feelings that can inspire love and accompany love; feelings of affection, admiration, connection, euphoria, joy and gratitude. These are wonderful feelings. But the feelings themselves aren’t love, because love is not a feeling. When you read the Apostle Paul’s famous definition of love in 1 Corinthians 13, you quickly realize that he describes love in terms of behaviors and attitudes, not feelings.
The Biblical idea of love is that we behave in a loving way toward the people in our lives. We choose to be kind, patient, encouraging, honest, forgiving and gracious. These behaviors are not feelings, but they often do produce feelings and reinforce feelings. The goal of true love is to treat people in a loving way even when we do not particularly feel like doing so. This is a level of emotional maturity we should all seek to attain.
Ultimately, life is about loving relationships. Love is “the main thing” in life. But love is a skill we must learn to develop and practice. Let’s devote ourselves to developing the skills that love requires. Then the feelings will come along for the ride.
Pastor Mark Miller